SPOILERS: If you plan on watching this, don’t. But if you insist there will be a couple spoilers in this review.
I would like to welcome you to the first official installment of “Bad Movies with Tim McDonald.” The idea here is that I watch bad movies so you don’t have to. I make fun of them and warn you about the terrible-ness of the movies. If you have seen a bad movie that you want to warn others about, put the title of the movie in the comment area below and there’s a good chance that I’ll review it for you. Thank you for your support.
When I reviewed “The Legend of Hercules” I thought ‘There is no way the Kellen Lutz Hercules movie is going to be better than the one with Dwayne Johnson.’ I now know that I was very wrong. Please don’t bother watching either of these movies, but if you have to pick one, I would say the Kellen Lutz version; only because it isn’t such a complete let down. If you want to watch something GOOD with Hercules in it, watch the Disney movie or the TV show with Kevin Sorbo. Do not waste your time with either Hercules movies made in 2014.
The acting in this movie is the high point. Unfortunately, even the best actors in the world can’t make this terrible dialog worth a damn. I am a big fan of Dwayne Johnson but even ‘The Rock’ couldn’t save this sinking ship. This isn’t the worst thing he has been in by any stretch; but this is definitely towards the bottom of the list, and I’ve seen Doom and The Tooth Fairy. It is full of great actors but I feel like it received the “Batman Forever” treatment, good actors and a terrible script. It could have been worse, at least the Hercules outfit didn’t have nipples.
Seems Quick Mike and “Davey-Boy” Bunting got to Tydeus as well
KAHN!!!
The script is awful. The dialog is just terrible. Not even an attempt by anyone to do any accents whatsoever. The coolest parts of the movie were in the trailer and it turns out to be false in the story anyway. They explain the Hydra story as a bunch of people in masks and not a monster. All of his trials are completely trivialized and debunked within 5 minutes. If I am going to watch a Hercules movie, I want to see some mythology, not a Mythbusters episode. I want a Hercules movie with some monsters, magic, and Greek Gods. If you want cool greek myth, check out The Odyssey TV miniseries. It’s older but done so well you won’t care.
We are in 2014, special effects better be awesome if you are going to bother. The effects used here are OK, but nothing spectacular. I was hoping for some killer stop-motion animation, like in Jason and the Argonauts; but again I was disappointed. Let downs all around I suppose.
Apparently being the son of Zeus comes with dental
When I go to see a movie about mythology, I want the full-on effect. I want Zeus on Mount Olympus and evil Hera with all the other Gods. I don’t want reality, debunked monsters and mercenaries; I want Hercules the way it portrayed in the myth, maybe even played by someone from Greece. Don’t get me wrong I’m not stuck on an actor that has to be Greek but Joe Manganiello would be a good choice. He has a good look for Hercules, acting chops, and not too well known so people can get sucked into the story. This whole time I felt it was ‘The Rock’ playing Hercules and not Hercules. “Hercules” is a bad movie but it was such a let down that it makes it so much worse than plain bad, very similar to my first sexual encounter but Hercules being longer than 2 minutes made it worse.
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